God is Good

Six years ago we had a financial need and God blessed me with the opportunity to keep a sweet, little baby boy in our home. Gareth quickly became part of our family and spent the next 5 school years with us. The extra income was wonderful, but the match with Gareth and his family was equally so. God had met our need better than we could have anticipated.

Last spring as Gareth was preparing to enter kindergarten, Joey and I began to talk about what should come next for our family. As much as we enjoyed having a friend in our home, we both felt it was time for it to be "just us" again. Especially with Alexander on the way, I didn't want to have my attentions divided any further than they had to be.

But it was hard to think about giving up the additional income with so many mouths to feed. I knew in my heart of hearts that we were making the right decision and that God would meet our needs, but I still went into the new school year holding my breath, not exactly sure how the budget was going to pan out.

And yet, I should have just exhaled and remembered that God promises to take care of all my need, to do exceeding abundantly above all that I could ask or think, that He wants me to prosper (not just squeak by) and be in health. I do not need to be anxious or afraid...He already has the answer. I just need to trust Him and walk boldly and with confidence on what He has promised in His Word.

I did grab my mind and confess these truths when I started feeling anxious last August. And then I did my best to do what God has called me to do:

1. Believe
2. Pray
3. Abundantly Share...give back to God from what He has blessed us with
4. Wait with excitement for the blessings and answers He has in store for me

So here's what's happened so far this year:

1. I signed up for new health insurance - Christian Healthcare Ministries - before I knew I was going to have Alexander. CHM covered 100% of my maternity, labor, and delivery costs.
2. A friend at the high school encouraged us to start a Teachers Pay Teachers store. It is a perfect fit for us...we can work on it when we have the time. We did and sales are slowly starting to pick up. Every dollar helps, right?
3. Another neighbor and friend had extra fruit and veggies leftover from her produce deliveries and asked could she drop them at our house each week. We have LOVED these weekly treats!
4. We took a good, hard look at our spending habits and made some simple changes that added up to big savings.
5. Throughout the year there have been little extra pockets of money in our bank accounts that I could not account for on my monthly budget spreadsheet.
6. At Christmas, we received an anonymous card with a very generous Walmart gift card inside.
7. In January, Joey received a hefty bonus for his IB English test scores.
8. Thanks to Alexander and the additional child tax credits, we will be getting back significantly more in our tax return this year.
9. And, just yesterday, I was notified that an anonymous good Samaritan paid for our summer pool membership! To say I was overwhelmed is an understatement! 

So you see, God provided as He always does...in ways I could never have imagined or anticipated. I am so thankful for this lesson and the opportunity to grow in my believing and walk that this year has provided. God is good...all the time. 

And to the incredibly kind and generous person who paid for one of our most favorite things - THE POOL!!! - "thank you" does not begin to be sufficient. We are so humbled by your walk of love and so thankful for this blessing. Though we do not know your name, we will continually pray for you and ask that God bless you back many times over! 

God Cares About the Little Things (The Story of the Pink Guitar)

Now unto Him who is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we could ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us,

Ephesians 3:20

About this time last year we found out that our homeschool co-op would be offering a beginner guitar class in the coming school year. Lily was thrilled. She had been asking to learn how to play the guitar for several years, but we hadn't made time in our busy schedule or room in our family budget to allow her to try learning a musical instrument. Now she would finally have the chance.

For me, that meant that I spent the summer in search of an affordable (most likely used) starter guitar. But since it's almost impossible to find a guitar (even a used one) that doesn't sound like a toy when it's played for less than $100, the search went on and on and on. During the hunt, Lily announced that she would really like a pink guitar. I was unaware that non-toy guitars came in colors and since all I really cared about was finding a good deal on a decent instrument, I told her color was not a priority. We were going to get the guitar we could afford. But I also told her a story I had heard many years ago:

Many, many years ago there was a minister that had a weekly radio show. He would talk about God's Word and people would call in with their prayer requests. One evening a woman called and told the minister that she was in need of a new home. She wanted him to add her need to his prayer list and added that she would really like the living room of the new home to have red curtains. The minister thought that was a silly request. After all, a home is a need. It doesn't matter what kind of curtains are in the living room. But, he told the woman he would pray for her new home. Some time went by and during another broadcast, the woman called back to tell the minister that God had blessed her with a home. "And when I walked into the living room, there were red curtains in the windows," she said.

So see, God cares about the little things, I told Lily. The minister thought her request was silly, but God didn't. God loves us. Why shouldn't the woman have red curtains her living room if that's what would bless her? The color of your guitar may only be important to you, but God loves you and wants to bless you. Go to Him in prayer and we'll see what he provides. I know whatever it is, it will be the best guitar for you.

More time passed. The start of the new school year was only days away and I still hadn't found a guitar for Lily. I had decided to settle on one I'd found on Amazon. The reviews weren't great, but it was the right size and in our price range. Right before I ordered it, I felt a tugging in my heart to check craigslist one more time. It was that still, small, quiet voice and I am so glad I was listening that day because when the page opened up I found this:

This $300 guitar was being sold for $50. I had seen it in a previous search and the reviews were great. Right size, right price. But the best part of all? It was PINK. I almost cried when I told Lily about it. "Look what God provided for you!!! It's better than I ever could have imagined!!!"

But the story gets even better. Turns out the little girl it belonged to didn't really use it at all. For all intents and purposes it was brand new. And, though I didn't attempt to haggle over the price, the mom only took $40 for it. That's "exceeding abundantly above." That's God.

I've been thinking about this story a lot the last few days. My heart and mind have been distracted with the many changes coming for our family in the next few months. New babies, new activities, new work endeavors, changes in our finances. There is much about which to rejoice, but there are also many things over which I could sit and worry. How will this work? Can I do it? Will that be enough? And recently on one really rough evening with the kids...oh my gosh, what are we doing???

It would be easy to get consumed with the unknown, but instead I choose to focus on prayer, on being thankful and praising God for all He has done and continues to do for us, on bringing favorite bible verses to my mind. Ones that remind me that God loves me, He will never leave me, He will protect me, He will meet my every need, He will comfort me, and that I never have to be afraid. And I think about that pink guitar. Because if God cares about the color of a 9-year-old's guitar, then he cares about my stuff too...the little stuff and the big stuff. 

When there is so much light, the darkness has to flee. And God loves me - and you - more than anyone else ever could. And he sees that - although we mess up (for me, sometimes it's a lot) - we are trying our best to know Him, love Him, and serve Him and are endeavoring to teach our children to do the same. So we can trust Him to be faithful. And sure, we'll still work as hard as we can at all our different jobs and we'll try to be good stewards of all God has blessed us with (not eating out as much and making the kids hand-me-downs stretch as far as they can), but it's God who will give the increase. And it is He who will receive all the praise and glory every step along the way.

A Year Full of Joy

The question Joey and I are most often asked  - besides "Are ALL those kids yours?!?!" - is "Sooooo, are you guys done having kids?" We smile and say, "Probably." I distinctly remember in the middle of Emerson's delivery thinking, "I am NOT doing this again! What kind of person would do this FIVE TIMES?!?!?!" There are, of course, a long list of logical, financial, and personal reasons to call our family complete. But the reality is we just don't know. Over the past ten years God has given us such a huge heart and love for children. Our home is so full of laughter, and love, and blessings. We have enjoyed this season in our lives more we could ever have imagined...so "never" is a hard thing to say.

Of course, all these feelings are amplified today because on the eve of Emerson's first birthday I'm a little nostalgic. Emerson Joy Walls was unexpected, but she has brought more joy into our lives this past year than we thought possible. We thought we were pretty maxed out on joy and then here she came, bringing with her a whole new dimension of love and light into our home. She has such a sweet, vibrant personality, lots of spunk mixed with an easiness that comes with being fifth in line. She adores her brothers and sisters and they shower her with attention and affection...she may be a bit spoiled, but how we've enjoyed watching them dote on her, play with her, and care for her. 

Emerson loves snuggling, eating (you name it, she can grind it up with her four teeth), animals, dancing, her blankie (which she sucks on constantly), her toy train and her baby doll. She is not quite walking yet - she's taken a couple of steps - but will be there soon enough and in the meantime we're enjoying her being little for just a bit longer. She can sign "more" and says "Mama," "Dada," "Bubba" (for her brothers), "yes," "bye-bye" (while waving), and ""nana" (for banana). We're looking forward to celebrating her this week and looking toward watching her grow in the coming year! How thankful we are for our sweet Emma Joy!

Grace

Every year on New Year's Eve our family gathers around the kitchen table. We pray together as a family, we remember blessings from the past year, and we each choose a bible verse that represents our resolution for the coming year. Last year mine was Psalm 100, five verses that talk about praising God continually. My goal for the year was to praise God not only when life was going smoothly, but also when it was faced with its challenges and frustrations.

Looking back at the past year, I couldn't have chosen a more appropriate year for this resolution. Quite possibly the most challenging year of our lives, 2014 provided lots of opportunities to practice being thankful and praising God when life got tough. In the midst of our first year of homeschooling with Joey teaching, leading the driver's ed program, and coaching three sports, we were also selling our home and having our 5th child. Amongst the happy chaos that is our everyday life, we sold our house, then lost the buyer two weeks before closing. We lived out of boxes for 5 months, finally sold our house again, and put a contract on a house that we later had to withdraw because there were $20K worth of major and immediate issues to make the house safe and livable (and the buyer wouldn't budge on the price). We started looking at apartments and rental homes that could accommodate our family of 7 (by now we had a newborn), found a place to live, moved with our 5 kids on a Saturday, moved Joey's dad from High Point to Garner on Sunday....it's been quite the year.

And yet, what an amazing year for growth.  What a joy to experience the complete and all-encompassing peace that comes when you truly trust God and give Him all the praise and glory, even when circumstances seem bleak. What an opportunity to teach our children by example...as Joey told the kids when we lost our first buyer, "It's a disappointment, but it's not a tragedy." And what an opportunity to see God working in our lives. We lost our first buyer two days before we were to pay for an inspection. During our second attempt to purchase a home, we received the inspection in just enough time to stop the appraisal, which saved us another $500. We were frantically looking at apartments, not sure where we were going to live, when a friend called with a lead that she got when she bumped into someone at the grocery store. I truly believe God was working in her heart that night. Literally overnight we had a place to live. When it was time to move we experienced an outpouring of support as family, friends, and neighbors gave of their time, talents, and muscle, moving the majority of our household in a matter of hours and entertaining our kiddos in the process. It was a labor of love that brings tears to my eyes every time I think about it. And, of course, the most beautiful blessing of the year was the birth of Emerson Joy Walls...our sweet girl who each and every day lives her middle name (never has there been a happier baby) and who, for the two months surrounding our move, slept through the night every single night like a champ. That's God. She doesn't sleep through the night now, but that's fine with me because she did when I needed her to the most.

Today, as I reflect on the past year and look forward to all that 2015 will bring, I have been considering what bible verse I want to choose for the coming year. One of the phrases on our new "family rules" canvas kept coming to mind, "embrace & extend grace." Grace - God's unmerited divine favor. We don't deserve it, can't earn it, and yet God lovingly extends His great grace to us time and again. It's something I want to practice in the coming year. For me, extending grace will include practicing patience, kindness, meekness, humbleness of mind, longsuffering, being slow to anger. These are things I want to demonstrate and characteristics I want to teach my children. After searching the bible, I found a beautiful verse that articulates my heart for the coming year:

But none of these things move me, neither count I my life dear unto myself, so that I might finish my course with joy, and the ministry, which I have received of the Lord Jesus, to testify the gospel of the grace of God.

Acts 20:24

I am so thankful for all that God has done this year and I am so excited to stand for Him in 2015 as I work to embrace and extend grace! Happy New Year, friends! My God bless you exceedingly abundantly above in the coming year!

I Choose Joy



I have been very blessed in my life to have wonderful Christian women (my mom especially) who have been examples of trusting God, being thankful, and walking in love, but it has been in just the last year, as I began to rearrange my priorities, first in my heart, and then by taking a leap and pulling my girls out of public school and jumping headfirst into homeschool with a renewed focus on God first, family second, that I have really begun to understand what those character qualities mean and how deeply they impact your life when you choose to demonstrate them.

I started contemplating homeschooling for selfish reasons...I missed my girls, they were growing up so fast, and I was missing it. I also was sick of the rush, rush, rush of the school, homework, dinner, bed routine that left little time to truly connect with them. It seemed that most of my interactions with them were during our nightly homework battles. Surely, I thought, we could do this better.

So we did it. We started homeschooling. And the experience of being with all my children day in and day out, educating them, playing with them, attempting to teach them life skills has encouraged growth in my own heart and character that I was not expecting. I began to hear Michelle Duggar's words ringing in my head, "There are lots of little eyes watching to see how you will react," and I began to feel a heightened awareness of my actions and reactions and began to seriously consider what behavior I wanted to demonstrate. Did I want to fly off the handle or did I want to show my children how to have a cool, calm head in a difficult situation?

One of my favorite things about homeschooling is that we begin each day with prayer and reading the bible together. I - probably even more than the children - am learning (or relearning) such important truths from God's Word. Before Christmas we were reading about the children of Israel who were in captivity in Egypt. God does all of these amazing things to get Pharaoh to let them go, they leave Egypt with all sorts of riches, God protects them, parts the Red Sea...you know the story. But what kept smacking me in the face over and over as I read was the Israelites' lack of trust, thankfulness, and appreciation for what God had done for them. When things were going well, they were thankful and praised God, but as soon as something went wrong or another challenge arose, they completely forgot about all God had done for them and what He had promised he would do for them. They started complaining and whining and blaming Moses (who was speaking for God) and several times they said they wanted to go back to Egypt...to SLAVERY!!! It seems completely crazy when you read the records and the kids even realized how foolish the Israelites were being, but unfortunately we could also pinpoint instances in our own lives where we had behaved in the very same manner. We had remembered to be thankful, praise, and trust God when things were going well, but had allowed negative thoughts of doubt, worry, fear, and self-pity take over when faced with life's challenges.

It should be easy to trust God. In addition to all the wonderful records in God's Word, I know from personal experience that God is going to take care of me, that He will do "exceedingly abundantly above" all I could ask or think. Why should I ever have reason to doubt? But as Christians we still have that "old man" worldly nature that we have to continually put off as we put on the mind of Christ. And it's that old man nature that I am fighting against when I'm trying to make dinner, half the kids are melting down, the baby just put a scratch on my freshly painted wall, I just spent my entire day getting ready for our 5th house showing of the week (which involved cleaning a house with 5 kids in it, then packing up those kids, along with food, diaper bags, and school work and leaving home for the remainder of the day) and then the feedback from the showing indicates that the buyers didn't like the neighborhood so they didn't even come in the house. It takes effort (sometimes minute-to-minute effort) to control my thinking and renew my mind to what the bible says, to choose to be thankful, to choose to praise God, and to choose to trust Him as my sufficiency when life makes me want to run away screaming (or hide under my covers in the fetal position).

Challenging situations are always going to arise because we live in an imperfect world, but in the last 6 months I have seen that when I choose peace, love, kindness, thankfulness, praise, and trust, the outcomes are overwhelmingly more positive - even blessings - for me and my family. It is true that the woman sets the tone for her household and I see that as a living reality in my own life. A 3 1/2 hour traffic jam in the snow could have been a nightmare, but I resolved to stay light, positive, fun, and thankful. I kept professing those things to the kids and tried my best to make it a "fun adventure" rather than a scary or frustrating situation. The result? The kids played with what little we had in the car, entertained each other, imagined that we were on the Mayflower...and a couple of days later Cassidy asked if we could go on another car adventure! Amazing. God blessed us as we chose to serve Him to the best of our ability with our hearts, attitudes, and actions. God never fails...even in the little things.

That is what I have learned - and am still learning - this school year. I don't have control over much in this world, but I can control my thoughts, my heart, my attitude, and my behavior. And I choose JOY.

On New Year's Eve our family sits around the kitchen table, drinks sparkling grape juice and chooses a bible verse that represents our resolution for the coming year. Psalm 100 is mine:

Make a joyful noise unto the Lord, all ye lands.
Serve the Lord with gladness: come before His presence with singing.
Know ye that the Lord He is God: it is He that hath made us, and we not ourselves; we are His people, and the sheep of His pasture.
Enter into His gates with thanksgiving, and into His courts with praise: be thankful unto Him, and bless His name.
For the Lord is good; His mercy and truth is everlasting; and His truth endureth to all generations.

Luke 1:37

Today we visited the ECU Pirates' football locker room where my mom had dedicated a locker in honor of my dad who played rover back at ECU from 1965-68. It was really fun to be inside the Pirate locker room...Jordan wanted to know if the football players would play football with him!

But the most important and precious moment of the day - the one I'll carry forever in my heart - is a message my dad had for his six grandchildren. Telling them of challenges, obstacles, and naysayers he faced on his journey to becoming a collegiate football player, he reminded him of what God's Word says, "For with God nothing shall be impossible." (Luke 1:37) This locker, he said, was for all of us and he asked that each time they thought of it that they remember, "When you set your heart and mind completely on something, you can accomplish it no matter what anyone else says. You go to God about it. You and God make a majority and with Him there is nothing you cannot do. Will you promise me you'll remember that?" Even though the oldest among them is only 7, it was evident that they took his words to heart as they solemnly nodded their heads and then lept forward to embrace their Gran.

Dad's locker

Dad's plaque on the locker

Mema and Gran with their grandchildren (and Joey and Bailey!)



Mom and Dad with their girls



Little Pirates
(Cassidy, Lily, Jordan, Summer, Finn, and Eli)



This is the closest I could get to everyone looking at the camera!




Mom and Dad with his plaque



Our Whole Family...every one of us a Pirate! Mom said to Mike, who was nice enough to give us the tour, "All of us graduated from ECU...well, not the children!" As we all chuckled, Cassidy piped up, "But we will one day!"

This empty locker graces the entryway to the locker room. I teared up upon reading the inscription...I am SO proud to be a Pirate!

Remembering...

The past two days have been full of laughter and tears. I think Gran would have been so blessed by the people who spoke at his memorial and graveside services. They honored him with comforting scripture and memories, both tender and funny. But even more than these, I think his heart would have thrilled to see the moments of joy found amongst a sad goodbye...the way my parents, aunts, uncles, and their cousins disrupted the 5th floor of our hotel Thursday night as they howled with laughter recounting childhood memories, his great-grandchildren walking hand-in-hand along the trails of a park he took my cousins to once, our take-over of Chick-fil-a on Friday evening as we treated ourselves to ice cream, passed babies around, and attempted to keep excited, over-sugared children from plucking the petals off of all the floral centerpieces, and my irreverent comment at the cemetary today upon hearing that Mema's gravestone still did not have the date she died on it - "Mema Bolton: Buried Alive!" - which sent us all into yet another fit of giggles. He would have loved to see that the heart of who we are as a family - the family that he and Mema built through love and trust in God - remained strong and constant, even though he is no longer with us. Through our laughter, joy, and love for one another we honor his memory, his life, and all he stood for.

At Gran's request, my cousin Allison read this devotional at the end of both services. It was obviously a message that was very meaningful to him and it touched us all as we listened carefully to the last words of advice he left for us:

For the Christian, old age, the beginning of the end, is really just the end of the beginning. After all, much more is to follow...

In a New England cemetery is a gravestone that reads, "Death has overcome." Next to it is another, "Death is overcome." Because it is overcome, the Christian has life on both sides of the grave...

... The world sees old people as being over the hill or at the end of their ropes. We are on a downward course. Aristotle equated age with degeneration on all fronts. If we were physical beings and nothing more, there might be something to say for this worldly view. But we are soul and body, made in God's image. Because we are up in years does not mean we are down on the graph of life. Instead of being on the far side of a bell curve, we are ever rising, rising, rising. And so at evening, it will be light. (Zechariah 14:7).

This is not the order of nature. In the natural ordering of the day, evening is dark. It is then that the shadows lengthen, and the darkness deepens. But the order of grace is the reverse. The sun never stops climbing. At evening the light is brighter than ever. God saves the best for last...

For the Christian, full of years, it will be light at evening. As Paul wrote to the Thessalonians, "You are all sons of light and sons of the day. We do not belong to the night or to the darkness" (1 Thessalonians 5:5).

We are not at the beginning of the end. We are only at the end of the beginning. There is much more to come.

Gran's graveside service included the playing of "Taps" and the presentation of the flag. I had only seen this ceremony once before when my Great Uncle Fred passed away. It is an extremely moving ceremony and I wanted to capture it on film so our family for generations to come would remember Gran's faithful service to our country.

A United States flag drapes the casket of deceased veterans to honor the memory of their service to America. The flag is placed so that the blue field with stars is at the head and over the left shoulder of the deceased.

After Taps has been played, the flag is carefully folded into the symbolic tri-cornered shape. A properly proportioned flag will fold 13 times on the triangles, representing the 13 original colonies. The folded flag is emblematic of the tri-cornered hat worn by the Patriots of the American Revolution. When folded, no red or white stripe is to be evident, leaving only the blue field with stars.

The folded flag is then presented as a keepsake to the next of kin or an appropriate family member.

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"On behalf of the President of the United States, the Department of the Air Force, and a grateful nation, we offer this flag for the faithful and dedicated service of Major Stafford L. Bolton."

A couple pictures from our time together...all of the children, of course. I can't ever seem to remember to take pictures of anyone else!

A beautiful stone bridge at the park

Lily, Sam, Finn, and Cassidy

"I made it all the way to the top, Mommy!"

Precious Cousins

The only picture I have of grown-ups :)

This stone is part of a veteran's memorial at the Masonic Home of Virginia. When my mom, aunt, and uncle told my grandfather that they were going to purchase a stone in his name he requested the words "one among many" inscribed above his name. The humbleness of spirit demonstrated here brings tears to my eyes each time I read it.

In Honor and Memory of My Gran

My Gran is no longer with us. He slipped away peacefully today. Almost 95, he outlived his sister, two brothers, beloved wife, and one of his sons. His character was an example to all who had the honor of knowing him. I think my dad summed it up best:

We called Mr. Bolton “Gran”. Mr. Bolton would have rivaled Abraham Lincoln for his honesty and integrity. There were no gray areas where he stood and where you stood with him. “Gran” had a keen perception of people. He treated everyone with respect. Perhaps most of all he loved those grandkids especially when they were babies so he could hold them as long as possible.

My Gran grew up in Rich Square, North Carolina with his sister Dorothy ("Dartie") and his brothers Roscoe and Tipp. They didn't have indoor plumbing and Gran and his brothers - who always loved a good joke - would torture poor Dartie by locking her in the outhouse!

Gran was in school at NC State studying architecture - living in a trailer with several other young men, one of whom only had one leg so his friends had nicknamed him "Hop-a-long" - but as war escalated in Europe and it seemed that US involvement was imminent, he left school and joined the Air Force. He married my grandmother exactly one month before Pearl Harbor was bombed. Soon he was being sent to California to board a ship headed for Australia. His unit was delayed and missed shipping off on the original boat to which they were assigned...this was a miracle for our family as that ship was sunk and Gran most surely would not have survived.

Stationed in the Pacific Theater - specifically Australia - Gran flew strafing missions. Although he was witness to a good friend's plane being blown up right beside his, we all are very thankful that he did not have to live through the horrors of ground combat or see the aftermath of the bombs he had to drop. I don't know much about his time in the war. We do have lots of letters he wrote to my grandmother, but anything relating to his missions was cut out by the censors. After a bout of appendicitis nearly took his life, the Air Force sent him back to the states where he was assigned to train new pilots. He and my grandmother enjoyed traveling to different bases, seeing the country and meeting new people.

After the war, Mema and Gran settled in Richmond, Virginia to raise their 4 children and a host of pets. Gran loved animals, which is why I guess he allowed Sam the pig to come live with them in the city! My mother remembers him as always being behind his newspaper. He didn't often directly communicate with the children, rather he communicated through Mema, but my mother recalls one time in particular that he reached out to her. She had finished her first year of college at Virginia Intermont, but was supposed to stay on campus past exams to participate in a program for one of the clubs she was involved in. Mom wanted to skip out on the program and come ahead home. As my grandmother was helping her formulate a good excuse so that she could come home early, my mom received a letter from Gran encouraging her to do the honorable thing and keep her commitment. Even in the smallest of things, he was a man of his word and he expected the same from his children.

These, of course, are all stories I've been told. The Gran I knew always had silver hair and wore suspenders with just about everything. He greeted us with big hugs and kisses when we burst through his door on Moss Side Avenue and had endless patience for us. He trapped squirrels in his backyard and safely released them at a park. He recaned the many rocking chairs that lined the wraparound porch at his house. He volunteered endlessly at his church. He poked holes in the top of mason jars and let us catch lightning bugs in his front yard. Over the years, he added two full bathrooms to their single bathroom home. He sang along with the car radio, crooning in the style of Bing Crosby...he had a really nice singing voice! Ice cream was Gran's favorite dessert and he would sit for hours patiently cranking the handle of his ice cream machine on the back porch until he had a perfect batch of homemade peach ice cream. Like all the Bolton clan, he loved to laugh and would often laugh so hard that he could scarcely catch his breath. I'll never forget him howling at the holiday dinner table as my Uncle Monk talked about a "cricket picket." I was a child and have no idea what the grown-ups were joking about, but Gran sure got a kick out of it!

At Christmastime, Gran would load all us grandkids into the back of his pick-up truck and drive us around the neighborhood while we sang Christmas carols at the top of our lungs. During other visits he'd take us all to Bryan Park where there was this wonderful little stream with big rocks in it. You could jump from rock to rock, which we all though was the most fabulous thing in the world. Gran would jump right along with us, but at some point would miss or slip and one of his boots would go into the water. His boots always seemed to have a hole in the side - maybe he wore his old boots on purpose - and we all thought it was hilarious to watch the water pour back out of the hole in the boot!

My cousins would always beg Gran to take us to the train station or the airport. My sisters and I were the youngest in the group, so we genuinely thought we were going to look at the planes and the trains...and we were plenty excited about that! Any outing with our cousins and Gran was a grand adventure as far as we were concerned. The reality, though, was that my cousins knew that there were vending machines at both locations and once we arrived they'd talk Gran into buying us each a candy bar! Gran probably knew what they were up to before we left the house, but he happily obliged and we all ended up with our own sweet treat!

As I said before, Gran loved animals. He had always heard that crows, if handled from infancy, could be tamed and even trained, so when a baby crow fell from its nest near his house he brought it home and began caring for it. Thus began one of the most beautiful and amazing experiences of his life. He and Little Bird formed a tender and very special bond. He taught her all sorts of tricks and they spent many a happy hour in each other's company. As fall approached, her family began calling to her and one morning after spending a few tender moments with Gran to say goodbye, she finally left. Gran was heartbroken, but what helped heal the hurt was writing their story and sharing it with our family. I am so thankful to have his words, his voice, in print that I can read and reread...it is truly a window into his heart. It is a beautiful story, which of course I cannot share in full here, but I do want to share with you the concluding paragraphs:

And so my story ends here of a loving and endearing relationship that enriched my life. It has been said the simple and unexpected pleasures and experiences often become our most precious moments and remembrances.

Now a final message to my children and grandchildren. Life is full of little surprises and extra pleasures. They are given you to enjoy. Be watchful and alert and always ready to take advantage of these "specials." Remember they were designed especially for you by the ONE who knows you best and what makes you happy. This was one of my "specials," as it came to me late in my life. My hope is having shared it in this way, you may come to love, enjoy and appreciate my little friend and remember her as your friend too!

I cannot begin to express how much I adored this man, how much I will miss hearing his voice and seeing his face at our Thanksgiving table, or how thankful I am that each of my children had the honor of being in his arms. I am so thankful for his love for God and for the loving example he set as the patriarch of our family. I am out of words, so instead here are some of my favorite pictures of one of the best men I've ever had the privilege of knowing:

Gran's gradeschool class...he's the one on the front row with the crazy hair!

Gran with his sister, Dorothy, and brother, Roscoe
(Can I just say how much I LOVE the giant bow tie?!?!)

From left to right: Roscoe, Tipp, Dorothy, and Stafford (Gran)



Gran and Mema...my favorite picture of them



A photo of the type of plane Gran flew in WWII

Gran's Flight Squad
(He's on the back row, far left.)

Gran and Mema both had beautiful blue eyes.

Gran's Flight School Graduation Announcement



Gran in a field overseas....anyone else wondering why he chose this moment as a photo opp?



Gran in his bomber jacket...this is before they were just a cool fashion statement! :)

So handsome in his uniform...

...not as fetching in all his flight gear! :)

Standing on his plane

I love this smile!

Planes at the airfield

Gran with his brother Roscoe at a family reunion in the Spring of 2006

Gran and Mema in their house on Moss Side Avenue

I've said this many times, but I'm going to say it once more: My Gran loved babies more than anyone else in the world. In fact, it was common knowledge in our family that if you wanted to hold the newest member of the Bolton clan, you'd better do it before Gran arrived...because once he got them, he wasn't going to let them go! I loved watching the tender way he'd talk to them and cuddle their sweet, little bodies. Here's just a few of my favorite baby moments:

Gran and Cassidy (Thanksgiving 2005)
Notice the giant spit-up stain on his shirt...he didn't even bat an eyelash.

Gran and Cassidy deep in conversation

Gran reading to Cassidy (Spring 2006)

Meeting Lilybug (August 2007)

This one is so beautiful that we have it framed in Lily's room.

Lily and Gran checking each other out (Thanksgiving 2007)

Stealing a kiss

Gran and Finn (Thanksgiving 2009)

I was stunned when Gran was able to pick up our 30-pound toddler! (Thanksgiving 2010)

This one just melts my heart!

Gran was always so tender with the little ones.

Snuggling with Gran at the Masonic Home (July 2011)
Finn just went into the room and climbed right into his lap. It was as if his little heart just knew how to comfort Gran's heart after Mema's passing.

Playing catch with Gran...I have some video of this as well as some of Cassidy talking with Gran that I will cherish forever.

Big throw!

Lily, Samantha, Finn, and Cassidy with Gran (July 2011)

Gran meeting Eli (August 2012)
He kept saying, "Look at the sweet boy, Mama."

Gran and Eli at Thanksgiving

Lily has always been a little shy around Gran, so this photo is especially precious to me as she went to hug him without prompting.

Cassidy hugging Gran

Eli, Finn, and Gran

Gran with his 10 great grandchildren

Gran with 7 of his 8 grandchildren

Gran and his children, Beverly, Marshall, and Susan

Gran with his children and their spouses

Stafford Lambertson Bolton
My Beloved Gran
April 17, 1918 - February 3, 2013